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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27907762">They Know What They Like</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabeReport/pseuds/BabeReport'>BabeReport</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Bill &amp; Ted (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Fingering, Come Eating, First Kiss, M/M, Masturbation, Porn With Plot, THE COME EATING IS VERY TAME, ass eating is mentioned?, but like actual porn, look Ted is loud and Bill is easy I don't know what else to tell you, morons to lovers, ted watches porn, the porn is the homosexual adventure music video</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 18:33:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,623</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27907762</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabeReport/pseuds/BabeReport</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Ted's most excellent self discovery, courtesy of Pansy Division (sort of)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ted "Theodore" Logan/Bill S. Preston Esq.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>95</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>They Know What They Like</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Wait, Wait! I can explain!<br/>Okay. So. This is my first real fic in this or any fandom, and I guess it's just gonna be horny right out of the gate, huh?<br/>If you haven't seen Pansy Division's music video for Bill and Ted's Homosexual Adventure, then this isn't gonna make a lot of sense. Sorry.<br/>If you have seen the video, then I'm sure that you, like me, have the image of pornstar-Bill-lookalike munching ass burned into your brain for always and eternity. We know he's out there. Anyway, this started as a joke of "imagine if Bill and Ted saw that video" and it very quickly got away from me.<br/>Extra special thanks to foxwatson and ohwoahdude, without whom I would not have the juice or the confidence to write this. They're coconuts talented, you should subscribe and read their stuff if you haven't already.<br/>title credit to Bill and Ted's Homosexual Adventure, thanks Pansy Division for this bounty which you have given.<br/>OKAY. Enjoy, ya filthy animals<br/>xoxo</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ted doesn’t know what made him take the video.</p><p>That’s a lie.</p><p>It’s not like he’s never seen porn before — he’s read dirty magazines, and he and Bill once watched a lifted porno tape Bill lifted from the store their junior year. It wasn’t an especially sexy experience; they had sat side by side in the Preston garage, faces burning and fingers itching, only making it halfway through the video before they thought they heard Missy pulling into the driveway, and Bill ejected the tape so fast he broke the button on his VCR. Five years later, Ted hasn’t tried to find a video since, still jilted after almost getting caught.</p><p>It’s not that he didn’t know about gay porn either. He may not be too bright, but he knows that guys have sex, and that they’ve got movies and magazines for gay guys, but he’s never thought much about it beyond that. It’s not that he thinks it's wrong, he’s just most certain that it’s not for him.</p><p>But. This <em>dude</em>.</p><p>In his defense, Ted didn’t come into the video store with the intent of stealing porn. He had been wandering around the mall for almost twenty minutes, dazed and exhausted after his long shift at Pretzels n Cheese, needing to move his legs and turn off his brain for a bit. He had meandered into the video store hoping to find something for him and Bill to watch together on their next day of -- that newest Star Trek movie did look most exhilarating -- but he soon found himself overwhelmed and getting lost in the aisles of tapes, wandering without thinking over to the very back of the store marked ‘adult.’</p><p>He had tried not to look too pervy, keeping his hands out in front of him and blushing a little once he registered where he was. He was about to hurry back to the sci-fi section when, in the furthest corner in the back, he saw a tape with two dudes on the cover.</p><p>It stood out amongst the other dirty covers-- not because it was especially graphic, but because, as far as Ted could tell, there weren’t any other gay tapes in the store. He thought it most unusual and wondered if the tape wasn’t supposed to be there at all, if someone had left it as a joke or a trap or a trick.</p><p>At first, it was the position that the two men were in that made him pause. They were curled on their sides sucking each other off -- sixty-nine -- and even in his flustered state, Ted couldn’t help but think,<em> excellent</em>. He told himself he would look for just a half-second more before moving on, and his eyes had just grazed up to check one of the men’s faces when he stopped.</p><p>His first thought was the obvious: the guy looked like Bill. Like, a lot like Bill. He had checked around to make sure no one else was watching before leaning in slightly for a closer peek. Yeah. They had the same curls, soft and bouncy. They had the same blonde eyelashes, the same sculpted jaw and straight nose. Ted couldn’t bring himself to really look at the guy's mouth where it was wrapped around his co-star’s cock, but he was willing to bet that their lips are the same, too.</p><p>That forces a second, way less obvious and way more intense thought into the front of his mind: this guy may look like Bill, but he’s got nothing on him.</p><p>From that point he had acted on instinct alone, shoving the tape under his vest and making a beeline for the exit, walking right past the bogus Star Trek tape he had been looking for. He hoped to didn’t look too obvious, leaving without buying anything and bumping right into the doorframe on his way out.</p><p>Bill had taken their van to go visit his dad, leaving Ted to walk home; normally, he wouldn’t mind, finding the sunshine and the quiet most tranquil, but now the few blocks from the San Dimas mall to their apartment complex seem to stretch on for miles. He holds the tape close to his chest all the way home, hair whipping in his face as he runs, sweat pooling under his shirt and most likely leaving a most odious dark spot on the cheap cardboard cover of the vhs.</p><p>When he finally makes it to the apartment, he can feel where the tape has left little red indents on his skin from being held so tightly, but he doesn’t let go as he unlocks the door and enters the threshold. He’s lucky Bill is still at his dad’s, and once he’s in the bedroom, Ted throws the tape under his bed, paranoid that his roommate might burst in in the next second.</p><p>He’s distracted all throughout dinner, picking at his rice while Bill talks about how his dad’s going to take some class for divorced men at the rec center, and how he’s pretty sure the old lady at the Chinese takeout place has been giving them extra lo mein since he helped her take out the garbage.</p><p>Ted tries not to focus on the crinkle around his mouth when he smiles and slurps his noodles for emphasis.<br/>----</p><p>Ted doesn’t touch the tape for another four days, but he can feel it burning a hole where he squished it between his mattress and his bed frame. He thinks once about telling Bill, maybe passing it off as some kind of joke, but he knows that’s the flimsiest excuse, and even if it wasn't, he knows his red face and shaking voice would give him away.</p><p>He resolves to watch it the next day that Bill has a long shift without him, figuring that while it’s pretty non-non-heinous to steal a porno because it reminds you of your best friend, the heiniousity of stealing porno without even watching it is worse.</p><p>He bums around the living room for a while after Bill leaves for work, not wanting to seem too eager, but after an hour of reruns and half-hearted attempts at songwriting, he can’t take it anymore. He digs the tape out from under his mattress -- <em>not</em> looking -- pops it into the VCR, and settles himself in front of the screen.</p><p>It’s obviously pretty low-budget, but there is a very nice musical intro, and Ted hopes that maybe the band playing in the beginning will keep going once the sex stuff starts so that he can at least pretend to himself that he’s in it for the music.</p><p>They don’t. It’s all quiet except for the crackling sounds of the camera rolling. They’re shooting somewhere outside, by a pool maybe, judging from the furniture, and has to try very, very hard to to think about how much it resembles their own complex’s pool.</p><p>He’s relieved to see that the other guy doesn’t look much like him or Bill or anyone they know. He’s got dark hair though, and Ted’s breath catches a little when he sees the two of them kissing with their faces hidden by their hands, light and dark compliments to one another.</p><p>Once they start kissing in earnest, Ted feels himself relax a little bit. The wet sounds of their mouths and the little low moans they let out are soft and easy, and</p><p>Ted thinks that maybe he can just settle into it. This isn’t so bad; maybe he can just watch passively, slip away from himself.</p><p>That thought lasts all of two seconds once they start stripping.</p><p>Ted feels a lump start to form in his throat, and he can’t help but swallow through it when he sees them take their half-hard cocks out. The dark haired guy stays in his briefs for a minute as the blonde guy runs his hands over his ass and slips his fingers between his cheeks over the fabric. Ted gulps again and feels his own cock twitch where he’s starting to chub up in his jeans. He knew that gay guys did anal stuff -- even if he wasn’t totally sure how it worked -- but it had never occurred to him that you could just. Put your fingers there.</p><p>He feels a knot form in the pit of his stomach as he watches them undress and pet over each other. He’s fully hard now, but the idea of touching himself, of actually getting off to this seems too much. He moves his hands up and down his thighs instead, trying to ground himself with the feeling of the denim, but his skin feels hot under his palms. He decides that maybe, it’s not too weird if he palms himself through his jeans, so he does, running the heel of his hand over his cockhead once the dude -- the Bill Dude -- lays his partner down and starts to suck him off.</p><p>He starts out slowly, just licking at the head and leaving wet, open mouthed kisses down along the shaft. Pretty soon though, he’s taking him all in his mouth, and Ted has to unzip the front of his jeans to take himself in hand, the friction leaving him wanting. The dark-haired dude keeps his legs in the air the whole time, thighs spread so Ted can see everything.</p><p>Ted’s brain starts to feel fuzzy, and he’s not sure when they change positions, but suddenly the Bill-dude is grabbing and massing at the other dude’s ass before spreading his cheeks open and licking into his hole. Ted moans with the way his hands move, the slope of his jaw when he bites gently, and Ted thinks of Bill, fucking him with his mouth. He feels a pull in the pit of his stomach, wanting suddenly to know what it’s like to have Bill’s tongue inside him, the warm, plush wetness around him, and he sucks on his fingers without thinking before pulling down his jeans and his briefs.</p><p>He keeps his eyes fixed on the video, not thinking of Bill, and reaches back to slip his fingers between his own cheeks, just curious, just wanting to see if it really does feel good. He shakes from the newness of the sensation, but it’s not a bad feeling, and he circles his fingers over his rim, just to tease.</p><p>He watches the not-Bill spit against the other guy’s whole, and on impulse, he spits on his own fingers before pulling his foreskin back to rub little circles over the head of cock and pushing a single wet finger inside himself.</p><p>His orgasm rushes in before he can register it, and all Ted can do is lean forward to press his forehead against the screen, mouthing at it just a little. He moans -- sounding way whiner than he expected -- and clenches his teeth as he spills out into his hand.</p><p>The video is still going, but Ted just shakes his head and ejects it as he tries to come down. He holds it in his clean hand, licking the cum off the other when he can’t find anything to wipe it off on. The strange silence of the empty apartment rattles through him, making him feel dirty and ashamed. Ted shakes through it, stashing the video back under his bed before turning on the shower, grateful for the loud patter of the water droplets against the tub.</p><p>Once he’s in the shower Ted feels his head start to clear and his body start to settle. He keeps the cold water on for a few minutes, letting it soothe him where he’s still shivering and sensitive.</p><p>He leans his head against the wall and pushes his wet bangs out of his face, most confused by what he just saw, and most egregiously confused by what he did. It makes a little sense to him; after all, gay guys wouldn’t do this stuff if it didn’t feel good at least a little bit, right?</p><p>Ted wiggles, trying to get his brain on straight, and once he’s all soaped up, he reaches back to press his index finger inside himself, propping his foot up against the edge of the tub to try and get a better angle.</p><p>It’s different from anything he’s used to; there’s a sharp sort of burn, but it doesn’t hurt, and Ted thinks he might just be able to get used to it when he twists around and slips, catching himself just before he falls. The shock is enough to keep him from trying anything else, and he only feels a little relieved as he rinses off.</p><p>He’s distracted at dinner again, nearly slicing his fingers with a kitchen knife as he cuts tomatoes, hypnotized by the way the veins and tendons on Bill’s hands shift when he lifts the pan up to stir it. Bill catches him looking, and smiles and waves. Ted waves back.</p><p><em>Bogus.</em><br/>----</p><p>Ted goes another week without looking at the video.</p><p>He thinks about it plenty, though — when he’s watching tv, when he’s trying to practice, when he and Bill greet each other in the morning. He’s had to jerk off nearly every time he showers, and he's tried to finger himself a couple more times, too. He thinks about the video every time, because it’s better than thinking about Bill. Now that he’s actually seen what two guys can do, it’s impossible not to imagine doing it with Bill.</p><p>He knows it would be different, clumsier, and that there’d probably be more talking as they kissed and pet and coaxed each other open. He knows they would check in with one another often, with a soft <em>Yeah?</em> or <em>Feels good?</em> or <em>Is this what you need?</em>  where they’re pressed against each other. He thinks he might laugh when it got too much, and Bill would laugh back, and then they’d dip back in.</p><p>Ted tries not to let those thoughts linger, because it’s not the gay stuff that makes him feel so twisted inside, it’s the <em>Bill</em> of it all. It’s that he wants Bill's fingers and Bill’s mouth, and he knows Bill doesn’t want him back. It’s the wanting that drives him crazy, the knowledge that some part of him always wanted. It’s the creases in Bill’s cheek when he falls asleep with his face pressed against the couch, Bill’s fingers when he’s tuning his guitar, Bill’s eyes in the morning, heavy and warm.</p><p>It’s easier for Ted to think about the video. No faces, no kissing, just strangers having sex. He jerks himself in the shower and tries to remember their bodies, and after he comes down, he always returns to that one close-up shot. He thinks often about how he’s never looked at himself there before, and he wonders if maybe it wouldn’t seem so scary if he were looking at his own.</p><p>It’s not until he’s at Circle K to pick up chips beer after another long shift that he resolves to do something, grabbing a fifty-cent hand mirror before he can chicken out and stop himself. When he loops around the back of the store, he finds a small selection of lube in the furthest aisle, and after a second’s consideration, he grabs the cheapest one.</p><p>He feels very clever and proud of himself until he realizes it’s one more thing he has to sneak in and hide from Bill. He’s lucky the cashier isn’t one of the regulars who recognizes him, and she doesn’t even give him a second glance as she rings him up and hands him his things in a brown paper bag.</p><p>He’s sweating and jittery all the way home, and just when he’s almost managed to convince himself that he can act normal, he enters their place to find Bill already out of the shower, wearing nothing but his sleep shirt and boxer shorts. He waves over at Ted from the couch, and Ted tries not to bolt into the bathroom with his things, not even bothering to take his snacks out and set them in the kitchen first.</p><p>He shuts the door behind him and turns the hot water on before stripping naked and sitting on the floor against the tub with his mirror in one hand and his lube in the other. He takes a minute to make extra sure that he can still hear the tv going before he takes a deep breath, spreads his legs, pulls up his knees, and looks.</p><p>It’s not dissimilar to the guy in the video, but it’s a part of himself that Ted recognizes as his own, the same as his hands or his knees or his eyes.</p><p>There’s that same soft pink patch of skin. He licks his middle finger and touches it gingerly, shuddering a little at the cool wetness.</p><p>Ted just stares, not wanting to touch yet, cocking his head over to one side and folding over himself to try and get a better look. He’s put off by how normal this all seems, like he could have done this years ago, and he starts to get an itch in his palms, needing to touch.</p><p>He sets the mirror down as quietly as he can and squeezes a dollop of lube onto his fingers, massaging over his rim, getting himself used to the feeling before sliding a single finger in. It’s so much easier with the lube, just a smooth slide, and once he’s in to the knuckle, he slides his finger a little ways out and presses back in deeper, trying to mimic what he can remember from the video.</p><p>It’s warm and tight and not bad at all, and he lets himself get lost in it, the push and pull inside him, feeling the pressure behind his navel as he starts to relax. He massages upwards, trying to figure out what feels good, and he just grazes a spot so sensitive he can’t stop himself from moaning. He clamps his mouth shut and waits until he’s positive Bill didn’t hear him before stroking the spot again to make sure it wasn’t a fluke. It’s not; it’s good, every time he hits it, the pleasure so bright it’s almost uncomfortable in the best way, and Ted wants more. He can feel himself getting harder, and he strokes just once over the base of his cock, another moan getting caught in his throat.</p><p>He slides his finger out carefully, a high noise slipping out of him at the sudden emptiness. He takes another slow, deep breath while he lubes his second finger up, and very, very gently presses two of them inside. It’s more of a stretch than the first one, and he takes another minute to adjust, stroking himself slowly, forcing himself to relax, not worrying about all the little sighs and moans he’s making until he hears a soft knock at the door.</p><p>“Hey, dude, are you alright? You’ve been there for like, twenty minutes.”</p><p>Ted freezes, fingers still inside himself, hand still wrapped around his cock. He pulls himself out of his stupor, trying to remember if he locked the door -- he’s most sure that he did, he had to -- and once he’s calm enough to speak he replies, “Uh-huh.”</p><p>“Are you sure dude? You don’t usually take this long.”</p><p>Ted doesn’t want to think about how Bill knows his shower schedule, so instead he just bites his tongue and calls back, “I’m-<em>mmh</em> fine, I swear, it’s just m-<em>oh</em>-st humid in here!”</p><p>“Okay...” Bill still sounds a little worried, but Ted can hear him start to back away from the door “Don’t take too long though, I still gotta shave.”</p><p>Ted knows he should stop now before Bill starts to get suspicious again, but the reminder of Bill on the other side of the door, -- hair still a little wet and face unshaven -- makes Ted start to move his wrist again. He slides his fingers in a little further, letting himself think about Bill’s face, the gentle scratch of his stubble on Ted’s face and neck and thighs. It still burns a little, but it’s not a bad sensation, and he pushes in deeper before spreading and scissoring his fingers experimentally, just getting used to the stretch.</p><p>The mirror over the sink is all fogged up now, and the room feels warm and damp from the steam. Ted can hear the patter of the shower droplets hitting the tub over the sound of his breathing, and he tries to ground himself with the little splashing sounds, the cold tub against his back, taking slow deep breaths until he’s certain he can be quiet again.</p><p>He speeds up his hand and pushes his fingers out and back in, choking on little whines as the combined friction overwhelms him. It’s <em>so</em> good and so <em>much</em>, he just wants to chase it, and he curls his fingers upward to try and press that same spot before. He hits it, even more intense with two fingers, and the sensation mixed with the lingering thrill of nearly being caught forces another whine out of him before he can stop himself.</p><p>He moves the hand stroking himself to cover his mouth instead, banging his elbow against the edge of the bathtub with a sharp smack. He yelps out, the pain buzzing through his whole arm and pulling him back from the edge.</p><p>As he pulls his fingers out to grab his sore elbow, he hears a soft cry of “Whoa! Ted, you okay?” There’s a rush of footsteps, then the jiggling of the doorknob, and it’s at that moment that he realizes --<em>Ted, you bonehead</em> -- that he most certainly did not lock the door.</p><p>He doesn't have time to react before Bill bursts in to find him slumped up against the tub, thighs still spread on either side of himself. He’s grateful that he at least already took his fingers out, but he flushes knowing that he’s still fully on display, his hole slick with lube, red and a little stretched out, his cock still half-hard against his stomach.</p><p>He waits for Bill to yell at him or charge at him or run out, but he doesn’t. He just stands there blinking dumbly, transfixed at the sight of Ted before him.</p><p>“Dude, Ted I—” he already looked a little pink, but now Ted can see him flush all the way down his neck, “I’m sorry, I— I thought you fell, dude, I— dude.”</p><p>There’s a long silence, thick and heavy in the steamy air. Ted rubs his elbow, still splayed out and panting, unable to meet Bill's gaze. When he finally glances upward, he can see that Bill's tilted his head to the side the same way that he did when he was by himself with the mirror, and it dawns on Ted that this is the first time Bill’s seen anyone this way, too.</p><p>Ted waits for the shame to start creeping in, but it doesn’t. He’s embarrassed to have been walked in on, and he most definitely wishes he hadn’t hit his arm on the bogus bathtub, but the guilt that had been gnawing at him the past week doesn’t settle back in the pit of his stomach like he expected.</p><p>Maybe it’s the fact that he doesn’t have to keep it a secret anymore -- however weird this new part of himself may be -- or maybe it’s Bill’s face, so open and earnest, like he’s not even mad.</p><p>Maybe a little bit of both.</p><p>Ted realizes that he’s still naked and he’s got the water running, so he leans over to turn off the tap before pulling his towel around his waist and leaning on the edge of the sink.</p><p>“Are you okay, Ted?”</p><p>It’s not the question Ted expected, and he can’t help but feel a little flutter in his stomach as he nods with a soft, “Mhm.”</p><p>“You’re not hurt or anything? It sounded like you slipped.” Bill takes a step closer, and his hands twitch at his sides like he wants to reach out and check.</p><p>“I’m alright, promise.” Ted twists his elbow to test it, only wincing slightly as the pain dulls down, “I just smacked my arm on the tub.”</p><p>“Bogus,” Bill mumbles. He breathes in like he’s gonna say something else, but he just sighs and stands there with his mouth wide open and brows knit together.</p><p>There’s another long stretch with nothing but the occasional drips from the leaky bathtub until finally, finally, Bill asks, “Were you getting off, dude?”</p><p>It’s an obvious question and they both know it, but Ted just nods, letting his bangs fall over his eyes.</p><p>“That thing — the thing with your fingers — where’d you learn that?”</p><p>They’re already too deep for Ted to deny anything, and Bill sounds more curious than upset, so Ted admits, “I saw it in a video.”</p><p>“Woah,” Bill furrows his brow and purses his lips. “Like in a porno?”</p><p>Ted nods, “I saw it at the video store, and I didn’t mean to just take it, but—” he stops, because he knows that this is where Bill might really freak out on him.</p><p>“But what, dude? C’mon, I won’t be mad. Promise,” Bill says, and Ted wants to believe him.</p><p>He takes a deep breath, “The guy on the cover looked, he looked like you, dude,” he mumbles the last few words so quietly that he’s not sure Bill could hear him, but Bill must’ve because his eyes go wide and his eyebrows get all knotted.</p><p>“No way, really?” Bill asks, no trace of anger in his voice.</p><p>“Yes way,” Ted nods, “It was most incongruous.”</p><p>Bill swallows and whispers low in his throat, “Can I see?”</p><p>Ted feels a weight drop hard in his chest, too startled to speak, but he nods and walks over to his bed with Bill close behind. He has to dig around under his mattress for a few seconds before he finds the tape, and he hands it to Bill without looking at the cover, blushing hard.</p><p>Bill sits on the edge of the bed and stares, muttering “sixty-nine,” with a small smile before he registers man’s face. His top lip twitches upwards, and Ted can tell he’s thinking hard.</p><p>“You’re right dude, it is most uncanny,” Bill says with a frown, “but I don’t, I still don’t -- why’d you take it if he looks like me?”</p><p>“I dunno, dude,” Ted answers, and he knows that Bill knows he’s lying. “I mean, I do know, but I didn’t when I took it. But then, once I took it, I knew.”</p><p>“Knew what?”</p><p>Ted feels hot and flustered, but he wants to say it, he has to, “That I’m into you, or into that or both, maybe.”</p><p>He sighs and takes a minute to think, knowing that Bill won’t interrupt him “I think I was always into you -- in that way, I mean -- and I just couldn’t figure it out before,” he finishes with a little puff and looks down at his lap, picking at a loose thread in his towel, “Sorry, that’s too weird, isn’t it?”</p><p>“No way, dude! I mean, I get it -- I mean. Me too, dude.” Bill’s smiling even as a deep flush spreads across his face, “I mean, I’m into you, too, dude.”</p><p>Ted feels a warmth rush over his whole body, fluttering in his heart and his stomach, and all he can do is blink and shake his bangs out of his face because Bill is into him. His mouth feels dry when he finally manages to say, “Yeah?”</p><p>“Yeah!” Bill grinning and nearly breathless, “Kinda wish we’d figured it out sooner, then you wouldn’t have hit your arm on the tub.”</p><p>Ted touches his arm where it’s still tender. “But if I hadn’t hit my arm, then we never would have figured it out.”</p><p>“A most astute observation, Ted,” Bill agrees, and he scooches a little closer to Ted so that they’re sitting shoulder to shoulder on the mattress. Ted wiggles nudges Bill’s shoulder with his own, just to let him know he’s there, and Bill nudges back, playful and sweet.</p><p>There’s another few minutes of silence, the sounds of their breathing soft and easy as they sit and lean up against each other, and Bill startles Ted when he whispers, “Ted? Does it hurt?”</p><p>“Hmm?” Ted shakes his brain awake, “My arm? It’s not so bad now.”</p><p>“No, the thing -- y’know, with your fingers?” Bill leans in to face him, “When they’re inside you, does it hurt?”</p><p>“Oh.” Ted shakes his head “It’s a lot, and it kind of burns a little, I guess? It’s sort of uncomfortable, but only for like a second.”</p><p>Bill’s mouth falls open as he lets out a shaky, “Yeah?”</p><p>“It helped a lot when I used lube, there’s more -- slip, I guess?” Ted feels goosebumps break out all over his arms, hot and turned on again describing all this to Bill, knowing now that Bill might want to do it to him. He’s suddenly most aware of his body, still wearing nothing but his ratty bath towel as he starts to get hard again.</p><p>If Bill notices, he doesn’t mind. “Does it feel good?”</p><p>“Yeah. It’s different, but once I got used to it it was, like, crazy good. There’s this spot, I can sort of reach it.” he hooks his fingers up to demonstrate, “I guess maybe I’m just extra sensitive there, but it just makes everything way more intense.” he swallows, feeling like he probably didn’t explain it very well, but when he looks over he can see that Bill is getting hard, too, the shape of his cock unmistakable where it tents out in his shorts.</p><p>“What do you think about, when you do it?”</p><p>Ted blushes and his cock twitches against the fabric of the towel, “You, dude. And I always tried not to, tried to think about the video or something else but-- we don’t have to do that, if you don’t want to, if it’s too much.”</p><p>“No way, dude!” Bill shakes his head so hard a few of his curls bounce out of place, “It sounds most transcendent -- the noises you made, in the bathroom -- I wanna try it, I want to make you sound like that, dude.”</p><p>Ted’s cock twitches again at the thought that Bill was listening to him, that he could have something of Bill’s inside him, and it takes all his focus to choke out, “Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Whenever you want, dude.”</p><p>“You can show me now, if you like.”</p><p>Ted swallows hard. “Here?”</p><p>“You didn’t get to come, right? When you hit your arm?” Ted nods again, prickly all over, “I can watch, if you like. I want you to show me, wanna know what you like, how to make you feel good, Ted.”</p><p>“Are you sure?”</p><p>“Most sure. Are you?”</p><p>Ted feels himself nodding with no hesitation, “Definitely,” and he lets his towel fall to the floor as he climbs over to lay at the head of the bed. Bill shifts to sit on his knees at the opposite end, facing Ted, and when Ted pulls his knees up and spreads his legs open, he can feel Bill looking; he takes a moment before pressing the first finger in, just wanting to watch Bill watch him.</p><p>He follows Bill’s eyes as they trace from his collarbone across his nipples, down to where his cock is already drooling precum and resting hard against the soft crease of his stomach. He lets Bill’s gaze linger between his legs where he’s still loose and a little sensitive before he pushes his index finger in.</p><p>It’s another smooth slide, and he gasps a little once he’s in to the knuckle. Bill echoes him with a gasp and gentle, broken, “Yeah?”</p><p>“Yeah,” he giggles, and doesn’t waste any time in moving, pulling his finger out and back in again and stroking himself slowly with his other hand. He can see Bill start to rub over where a wet spot is forming on his shorts, his eyes hooded and dark with arousal.</p><p>“Go ahead, touch yourself. I want you to get off, too.” he pets over that spot, just barely hitting it, and moans when Bill takes his cock out to jerk himself while he watches Ted writhe.</p><p>Ted’s not sure what to focus on -- his finger inside him or his cock in his hand or Bill, biting his tongue while he thrusts into his fist, the tendons in his wrist and forearm standing out with every stroke. They’re both panting and groaning into the space between them, and Ted adds another finger, stretching and scissoring them inside himself, wanting that to chase that feeling, that overwhelming muchness again.</p><p>He hooks his fingers inside himself, gently pressing that spot again and again, until he's squirming and twisting his legs over the sheets. He feels himself start to whine again, high and desperate, and he scrunches up his face and bites his lip hard to try and quiet himself.</p><p>“No, s’okay.” Bill’s voice is pleading and strained in his throat, “I wanna-<em>ahh</em> hear you.”</p><p>He sounds so hot desperate, Ted tosses his head back and moans so loud he can hear it echo off the ceiling. Bill is so close, Ted can tell with the way he’s gasping and shaking as he rubs over his cockhead. His face is all scrunched up, brows knit tight as he chases his orgasm, and Ted forces himself not to shut his eyes, wanting to watch as his whining and mewling gets Bill all the way there.</p><p>They both moan as Bill comes all over his fingers, the way his cock pulses and his face draws tight with pleasure pulling another high whine out of Ted. He doesn’t look away until Bill tucks himself back in his boxers and slumps forward, his face so pink and pretty when he looks up that Ted has to squeeze his eyes shut again. He feels the mattress shift as Bill knee-walks over to him, and for a second he thinks Bill is going to take him in hand and finish him off, the idea of Bill’s sweaty hands around him almost enough to push him over the edge. He almost jumps when he feels Bill’s hands around his thighs instead, one of them still wet with cum.</p><p>“Oh, sorry, dude, I got cum all over your leg, hang on.” Bill moves to wipe his hand off on his shorts</p><p>“No wait, I wanna—” Ted catches Bill’s hand in his own and raises it to his mouth to run over with his tongue, licking Bill’s cum off his fingers. The taste is close enough to his own, except a thousand times better because it’s Bill, and Ted tries to catch all of it with his tongue before sucking briefly at Bill’s index and middle finger, whining around them when Bill grazes his thumb across his chin.</p><p>He lets Bill's fingers slip from his mouth with a soft, “Okay?” waiting for Bill to nod and place his hands back on Ted’s thighs before he moves his own hand back to his cock to resume stroking himself.</p><p>“Is this okay?” Bill asks, and when Ted whines and nods, he strokes one thumb over Ted’s inner thigh and spreads him further open.</p><p>He’s close now, rolling his hips to try and grind down on his fingers while he jerks himself, mewling and whimpering up at the ceiling. He’s not really sure what he’s saying, just little strings of<em> I wanna</em> and <em>I’m gonna</em> and <em>Please</em> and <em>Bill</em>, just because he can. Because Bill is there, holding him open, squeezing Ted gently while he squirms, pressing his thumbs into his thighs.</p><p>“Ted, c'mon, I wanna see your face, dude, I wanna watch you come.” Bill sounds so soft that Ted’s sure he wouldn’t be able to hear him if they weren’t inches apart.</p><p>He tilts his head down, just enough that he can look at Bill’s face, and they’re so close, almost nose to nose. He can see Bill’s blonde eyelashes reflected in the lamplight, the little flashes of gold in his green eyes.</p><p>He presses inside himself and thrusts a few more times into his hand before he comes, shivering and whimpering. He shudders as he comes down, wiping his cum onto the side of the bed so he can wrap his arms around Bill and pet over his back, resting his head against Bill’s shoulder.</p><p>It dawns on him then that he and Bill haven’t still haven’t touched each other’s cocks and that he wants to, badly. He wants Bill to get him off, and he wants even more to return the favor, to make him feel good. Ted shudders at the feeling of Bill’s hands on his hips and thighs, the catch of the calluses on his thumbs, and a hundred half-formed thoughts spill into his head all at once.</p><p>He wants Bill inside him, wants his fingers and his cock and maybe -- <em>especially</em> -- his tongue, like he saw in the video. He wants Bill pressed against him, wants his skin, wants to lick and to touch and to taste. He wants Bill to come inside him and clean him up.</p><p>But mostly, Ted realizes, he just wants to kiss him. Everywhere. He wants to lean in where Bill is still blotchy and breathless against him and kiss him on his cheek, on his nose, his jaw, his mouth.</p><p>He settles for Bill’s shoulder, kissing where he’s still got his cheek pressed hot against his shirt. He sucks gently, trying to taste his skin through the fabric, and he can feel Bill shudder as he pulls back and leaves a wet circle. Bill shifts and moves to press a kiss to his hair, smoothing his hands over the crease where Ted’s thigh meets his groin. Ted works his way up Bill’s neck with feather-light kisses. He nuzzles his cheek against Bill’s, pleased to find that his stubble does indeed feel most excellent, and he pulls back just a little so they can rub their noses together.</p><p>They both sit there, holding tightly to one another, waiting, staring down at each other’s mouths until Ted can’t take it, and he closes his eyes and presses a little open mouthed kiss to Bill's lips, and another, and another, until they’re trading wet kisses in the tender silence. Bill moves his arms to wrap around Ted’s waist, and Ted cards one hand through Bill’s hair, stroking over his undercut.</p><p>It’s sloppy and desperate and <em>wonderful</em>, both of them fresh off their orgasms. Bill licks into Ted’s mouth, and Ted licks back, and they both start to giggle into kiss, feeling silly and loose even as they press in closer to suck on each other’s tongues and bottom lips.</p><p>It’s a most non-non-<em>non</em> heinous makeout session, and when they finally pull away with a wet noise, Ted can’t help but lean back in and press one more kiss to Bill's cheek, smiling when Bill kisses his jaw in return.</p><p>He flops back in the bed, and Bill flips down next to him with a soft, “oof.” They both laugh and wiggle their fingers in a celebratory air guitar before Bill leans over to cup Ted’s face and kiss him again.</p><p>He knows he definitely should shower now, his body sticky with lube and cum and still smelling a little like work. He decides to ignore it though, just for a minute, and instead lets himself lie back and feel dirty and sleepy and happy with Bill next him, kissing each other stupid in the dim light of their messy room.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Look at you! You made it to the end, smarty! Thanks for reading, you can find me on twitter @5ft_0chill, I sometimes say clever things. If you know me from the server, um. Please don't perceive me too hard.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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